Ever since I was a toddler I was obsessed with babies. The older I got, the more I loved kids. Around eight I found a new fascination- adoption. Through out high school I read endless parenting books, adoption books, foster care books, blogs, articles, and stories. I LOVED the idea of adoption and I loved learning on these topics. I always felt it would be apart of my story. 

Now, I am still pretty far from the point of starting a family. However, it’s seemed pretty obvious to me from the moment I understood what “adoption” meant that I wanted it apart of my story. I want to experience it. I want to grow my family in a way that has seemed so important to me from such a young age.

Does this make me selfish?

It was never about saving a child. It was never about a “gods calling”. It was never about a lack of other options. It was about adoption. The beautiful idea of adoption. The loss, the gain, the love, the family.

Do these reasons make me selfish?

It really isn’t too often you hear “I wanted to adopt” as the reason for adoption. In fact most stories consist of infertility, years of struggles to form a family, and many other tragic stories that lead to adoption.

I am not infertile as far as I know, though I am cursed with an incredibly irregular cycle–TMI? I would love experiencing pregnancy in birth-in fact I always imagined growing my family in both ways- but if I had to choose one, adoption wins every time, hands down.

Does this make me selfish?

Am I taking away from parents who can’t have a baby any other way? Am I offending those parents by my decisions and hopes?

I mean even when I was young and would make comments about adoption people would respond like “Why wouldn’t you just have your own”, but in my mind all I could think is “they would be my own”.

It wasn’t until recently that I started to wonder, am I selfish?